Sweet....

I decided to do this Blogg’y thing to blow off some steam and say things that should just be dying to be said. I’m doing this for myself and my own amusement, I don’t really care if anyone looks at this thing or not, I just wanna have fun doing it for awhile. I figure that at least one other person will see this thing eventually. That’s my wife. She is the military. About two and a half years ago we came back to the states from an overseas assignment. We decided that it would be the perfect time to start a family after 7 years of marriage. So she gave birth to our first child…within the first few seconds of his life she said to me “look, it’s your son”…other than her saying “I do” those words were the most wonderful and most powerfull thing anyone has ever said to me.

This was also not to long after the U.S forces invaded Iraq. Seven months later, my wife was forced to leave us…my son and me. She had to pack up and deploy to Kirkuk Air Base in the middle of Iraq. To this day that still sounds so alien to me…my wife, in Iraq. That’s just not right, in a world where I should have gone to a place like that, not her.

Well my boy was about seven months at the time. She was slated to be gone only four months, sure no problem…we have been apart for longer...that was before. It’s bitter to say, but having her gone was probably one of the best things that could have ever happen. I had no problem taking care of my son in my wife’s absence. Other men around me could'nt believe that I was doing that on my own. Some would shiver at the very thought of having to do it them selves. This kind of attitude appalled me. “This is my son" I would think, "why should this be a problem!”….made me sick to think why people think that way. Anyway, that time drew me so close to my son…changed my life. It created a bond with my son that I didn’t think was possible. He became a part of me that I never knew could exist. I think that maybe the love I have for my son can give me just the smallest idea about how God feels about us. What does this have to do with my wife…weather she intended it or not, I cant help but see this now but as a gift from her. There she was in a hostile country, doing her job of fighting for those who could fight for themselves. She was serving her time to help keep the fight from coming home to us. Some may not agree but she became the perfect mother that way.

While she was gone we still got some her magazines in the mail. One of them had a contest to pick the women or mother of the year or something. I put submitted my wife. Besides I figured she could use a free trip to Europe. She didn’t win of course, but she should have. There are some in our military, but not many that just had a baby and have to leave them mere months later. Go half way around the world and risk their life. That takes amazing strength to do. You think child birth is painful? Try doing what she has done as well…there are not many women out there who can say they have.

She got a medal out of it and all that hoopla. I don’t think she really cared about that. Hell ,no in her shoes would, coming home to her son was all the reward she needed.

He had become a person while she was gone….took his first steps and learned to walk…laughed…started eating solid food! By the time she got home he had become a little person! I was lucky; I got to have that all to myself and see every bit of it. She didn’t. It shouldn’t have been that way. She gave it to me instead; I needed it even though I didn’t know it.

Well… almost a year after she got home she gave birth to our daughter. Damn near a carbon copy of my son so far. This time I realized just how difficult pregnancy and child birth really are. I have realized that women are a lot tougher and stronger then most men I have known.


So if anyone asks me who the strongest person I have ever known is or who is my hero?…I tell them it’s my wife.

It’s a long story, but she has always wanted me draw a picture of her…her face…I haven’t picked up a pencil or a pen to do that kind of thing in years. Adulthood has the tendency to do that I noticed. Anyway, I have realized that part of me may not be able to do that. How can I capture what cant me seen? Can I make others see what I see? Feel what I feel for her from what I put on the paper? Then again, maybe it’s just the love of that movement….pen to paper.
I can capture her likeness, her beauty; perfect her face for the paper. Can I also capture the love? Would it be felt in the act?

Time will tell. This is for my hero, my guide and my leader

This is for my partner and my best friend

I love you.